The Evanses

Parachute

Sat, 26 May 2012 13:55:09 -0400

**At the dinner table, discussing plans to make parachutes for G.I. Joe figures**
Sammy: We could use a plastic bag from the grocery store.
Daddy: No, I don't think that will be quite big enough. I think we'll cut up a trash bag and use that.
Sammy: So we'll need a trash bag, and some scissors, and string and tape.
Eli: How big would it have to be to throw Abraham off the bridge?
Daddy: Much bigger. But we aren't going to do that, so don't worry about it.
Sammy: We could throw him off the bridge and he could land in a boat.
Daddy: Nope, we aren't throwing him off the bridge.

Brave Men

Sat, 26 May 2012 13:48:55 -0400

Sammy: Daddy, there really are some brave men in the world.
Daddy: Oh yeah?
Sammy: Yeah. When we were at the park today I saw a man with no shirt on and he had a tattoo on his chest that went right up to his nipple.
Daddy: Wow, that is brave.
Sammy: Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

"Our guys are taking over Target, Toys R Us, and the new library!"

Fri, 25 May 2012 13:05:01 -0400

“Our guys are taking over Target, Toys R Us, and the new library!”

- Sammy and Eli, while planning their afternoon playtime

"Look what I found in my grandpa’s attic. Wristbands. He was an exerciser so he had..."

Thu, 24 May 2012 16:52:01 -0400

“Look what I found in my grandpa’s attic. Wristbands. He was an exerciser so he had wristbands.”

- Sammy, while pretending with Eli and Abraham

"You shouldn’t say that in front of me because you’ll make me sad, like you already made..."

Tue, 22 May 2012 17:21:49 -0400

“You shouldn’t say that in front of me because you’ll make me sad, like you already made me.”

- Sammy, when Eli said he wanted to go to the playground without him

"The Lord’s prayer is a prayer that helps you do prayers."

Mon, 21 May 2012 17:08:51 -0400

“The Lord’s prayer is a prayer that helps you do prayers.”

- Eli

"Peachy’s baddest weapon is throw up. When she’s sick, she can throw up whenever she..."

Thu, 17 May 2012 18:00:27 -0400

“Peachy’s baddest weapon is throw up. When she’s sick, she can throw up whenever she wants. She also has a real sword.”

- Sammy, discussing important things with Eli

"Lego Bionicles are in extinction…there aren’t very many of them…but John said..."

Thu, 17 May 2012 17:55:28 -0400

“Lego Bionicles are in extinction…there aren’t very many of them…but John said they’re at Toys R Us.”

- Sammy, at dinner

Eli: What’s a “jerk”? Sammy: I don’t know. Eli: I think it’s...

Wed, 09 May 2012 13:07:01 -0400

Eli: What’s a “jerk”?

Sammy: I don’t know.

Eli: I think it’s somebody who kills people.

"Daddy can I have some of your rocks? Nevermind, I have my own dam rocks."

Sat, 05 May 2012 14:55:35 -0400

“Daddy can I have some of your rocks? Nevermind, I have my own dam rocks.”

- Eli, building a dam in the creek

"Eee eee well! Eee eee well! Eee my sooo!"

Fri, 04 May 2012 17:48:37 -0400

“Eee eee well! Eee eee well! Eee my sooo!”

- Abraham, singing “It Is Well” during family worship.

"Dad, do you know who Justin Beaver is? Aliza thinks he’s really cool, but Lauren..."

Wed, 02 May 2012 10:43:51 -0400

“Dad, do you know who Justin Beaver is? Aliza thinks he’s really cool, but Lauren doesn’t like him that much.”

- Sammy, while brushing his teeth last night.

"I want to eat celery every night before bed. The crunching would be like a song in my head."

Sat, 28 Apr 2012 19:51:11 -0400

“I want to eat celery every night before bed. The crunching would be like a song in my head.”

- Sammy, while eating dinner (which included some celery)

"Signs are like GPS. They tell you where to go."

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 18:45:02 -0400

“Signs are like GPS. They tell you where to go.”

- Eli, as we were driving Sammy to school

Eli, picking up a toy off the stairs Does this still have pee on it? I dropped it in the toilet.

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 18:43:05 -0400

Eli, picking up a toy off the stairs

Does this still have pee on it? I dropped it in the toilet.

A Bride

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 15:25:27 -0400

Sammy: Did you see me in the corner? I was praying and confessing my sin to God.
Daddy: What sin were you confessing?
Sammy: My bride. I did a bride.
Daddy: What?
Sammy: You know, I wanted people to think I’m better than I really am.
Daddy: Oh, you mean “pride”.
Sammy: Yeah, I did a pride.

Ottoman

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 17:14:46 -0400

Eli: I love sitting on the audience.
Sammy: It's called and ottoman.

A Rebuke

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 12:30:57 -0400

Sammy (during lunch): ... or a Samurai might stab you in the bottom!
Eli: No scatological humor at the table Sammy.
Sammy: Oh right. I forgot.

"Mommy, today I’m thinking about a funny thing. I’m thinking about love!"

Tue, 10 Apr 2012 09:24:35 -0400

“Mommy, today I’m thinking about a funny thing. I’m thinking about love!”

- Eli, while getting dressed this morning.

Overheard from the other room...

Tue, 03 Apr 2012 17:53:16 -0400

*Crash*
Sammy: Abraham! That was one of my greatest inventions and you broke it!
Abraham: Yup.
(5 minutes later)
Sammy: No Abey, not again!
*Crash*